1. Buying a season ticket, spending the whole summer in a state of unfounded optimism, only for us to be languishing in 17th place by mid December. Season over.
3. Getting asked the question ‘So which team do you support? City or United?’ by every Stockport resident, ever.
4. Banging your shins on ridiculously tiny turnstile gates as you walk through them.
5. Clapping the players for doing something simple correctly, even though it’d be a given at any other club. ‘Well done Assoumani, you managed to pass it 10 yards and not fall over!’ *clap clap clap*
6. When games against away at Macclesfield, Accrington and Morecambe used to fill you with dread, but now you’d give anything to have those games back.
7. Getting tempted once in a blue moon (sorry) to buy some half time food from under the Cheadle End, then queuing for half an hour, missing a rare County goal and only managing to grab a kit-kay chunky which cost you £2.30. Ah yes, that’s why I never bought food.
9. The 90 minute-a-week friendship you have with Dave, the bloke that sits next to you who hates all referees unconditionally.
10. The realisation that half the teams in this division are made up of ex-County players we let go of when we were decent, and you await the inevitable hat-trick they’ll score against us upon their return to EP.